A heart's sorrow
by leggomygreggo2
Summary: Arthur's King and he knows Merlyn has magic and she's his Court sorceress. They are as close as ever but he doesn't want just a friend he wants soul mate. He wants her to be his Queen... However will it be too late for him? Another mistake to add to the list as he watches her marry another? Crappy summary (and title XD) but plz read anyway :) FEM!MERLIN/ARTHUR :)
1. Chapter 1

_**Hey guys! New two-shot! This is another Fem!Merlyn/Arthur fic :)**_  
 _ **This two-shot is inspired by Christina Perri's song 'The Words' its an amazing song if you wanna listen to it :)**_  
 _ **So this will include some lyrics from the song, these will be in italics. Some parts of the song has changed places to fit the fic :)  
Also this will all be In Arthurs POV but if you guys want I can Write a bit of Merlyn's nxt chap (Comment if yes).**_

Arthur's king, Morgana's good, Gwen's with Lance (who is not dead).  
Features Gwaine's 'evil old toad' of a sister XD

 **DISCLAIMER: IDOM :( OR THE CHRISTINA PERRI SONG.**

* * *

 ** _Arthur POV:_  
** _  
'All of the lights land on you  
The rest of the world fades from view'_

As she walked into the room it was as if nothing else existed.  
The light of the moon cascaded through the great hall's window's, making her porcelain skin glow.  
As I looked at her the only thing my brain thought was how right Gwen was when she said purple was Merlyn's colour, for she looked like a goddess and I was surely gaping at the sight of her.  
Her purple dress, I had the best seamstress in the land make for her birthday, was long and dipped in the front, the material griping to her body showing every one of her curves and as if bees to honey my eyes were glued to her beauty.  
How a woman could be so gorgeous I do not know, but the elven beauty who walked towards me, cheeks blushing as all eyes turned to her, was what I had always thought perfection would look like.  
My eyes travelled up and down her body as if she was a map and I was desperately trying to memorise each feature, desperately trying not to get lost.  
My lighter blue eyes meet her deep blue eyes, the vibrant purple of her dress making her eyes more dazzling.  
I was ruined for any other woman, for none compared to her.  
Darkness surrounded me and she was the only light source, for without her I surely would have sunken into the same depression as my Farther did, all of the betrayal around me and she the one constant thing.  
My light in the dark.  
My saviour.  
My soulmate.  
 _  
'And all of the love I see  
Please, please say you feel it too'_

"King Arthur" I hear her angelic voice sound through my thoughts and my eyes instantly fell on her.  
She stood in front of me now, her neck bare to my eyes, craned upwards to meet my eyes, her shorter body finding it hard to do so.  
"Lady Merlyn" I reply taking her small pale hand into my larger ones, leaning down to kiss it gently.  
I swear I felt her slender body shiver at the touch and I had to hold myself back, my arms aching to be around her body to make her mine as my heart craved.  
"May I have the honour for this dance?" I ask, feeling myself melt as I looked deep into her eyes, as if they were the ocean, dark and oh so blue and I was drowning helplessly into them.  
"I cannot refuse the King of Prat's, now can I?" She says a smirk crossing her face making me only fall harder for her.  
"Idiot, just take my arm" I reply, my lips spreading into a smile as her eyes crinkle in the corners, her smile widening in joyous youth, and I gasp choking on my breath as she laughs. The sound was graceful and light a sound I could get used to hearing more and so I decided then and there I would make it my personal mission to hear the sound again, to hear it every day of my life.  
"Whatever you say, dollop head" She replies as she weaves her dainty arm into my muscular arms.  
And just as if she was made for me we fit together like two parts of a jigsaw.  
Two sides of the same coin.

 _'And all of the noise I hear inside_  
 _Restless and loud, unspoken and wild'_

I move, striding with such confidence as she stood at my side, weaving through the already dancing noble couples until I found a free space.  
Stilling my movements, I moved her body so it was in front of me, her body inches away from mine as the music slows.  
The melodic sound of the piano echoed through the hall as I place my hands cautiously on her hips, seeing no protest in her eyes, I let out a breath of relief tightening my hold on her waist bringing her closer, staring into her eyes waiting for her next move.  
I didn't know I was holding my breath until it came rushing out as she placed her arms around my neck, her eyes burning into my soul as I stare into her alluring face.  
My body started to sway back and forth on it own accord, my heart soaring as she places her head on my shoulder, her hips swaying under my hands.  
For once, it was she who leaned on me, seeking out my support as I held her body up.  
My heart was beating so fast, the nearness of her body making it work overdrive and I hoped to dear god she could not feel it thump against my chest.  
She fit into my arms so perfectly and I never wanted to let go.  
Not when I held her so close like I always had craved.  
Not when her magic enveloped me in comfort and safety.  
No, she was mine. I wanted her so desperately to be mine.  
To wake up every morn to her, to be able to hold her tight whenever I wanted, see the Queens crown rest on her raven hair, for I wanted no one else as my queen.  
To see her stomach swell in child, for she would be the only woman I could see baring my children.  
I felt my body wrap its arms tighter around her waist in an impulse, as my brain decided tonight I would tell her of the love I felt for her.

 _'And all that you need to say_  
 _To make it all go away'_

I feel her respond to my touch as she moves her hands downwards, until they rested below my shoulder.  
It was as if she was hugging me closer to her and I loved the sensation of feeling so needed as she trusted me to keep her steady as she leant completely on me.  
She was light and it took almost no effort to keep her upwards.  
I open my eyes never knowing when they had slipped closed, my eyes meeting her orbs as she stared up into my face.  
Her eyes twinkled in the candlelight which lit the room, her eyes shining with trust and something else I couldn't quite make out.  
I let us sway for a few minutes more marvelling at the closeness of our bodies before I grabbed her right arm, entwining our fingers together as I led her silently out of the great hall.  
I walked towards the newly made up tower which had fallen in disarray through the years.  
It once, a good 20 years ago, stood tall and proud but over the long years parts of the wall had crumbled off, the roof tiles falling off one by one and vines grew covering the grey walls.  
No citizen of Camelot, noble or not was allowed in this part of the castle for it contained all things magical, and after the purge it was abandoned.  
A shadow of former glory and as my Farther hunted down its occupants, one being Merlyn's farther...  
How ironic.  
It was the day after Merlyn told me of her magic I had decided magic couldn't be evil (well some magic) and I made Merlyn my Court Sorceress.  
It was that day, the tower had started to be made up, a place for Merlyn to learn magic and hide away from the world, for I knew life as the most powerful person on the Earth took its toll on the woman I loved.  
And now that the tower was back to its former glory I wanted to show her, to bring her back to the place her Farther once lived.  
"Arthur, Where are we going?" Her voice sounds and I smile gently at her.  
"It's a surprise" Was my only reply as we walk further onwards.  
I halt sharply before arriving at the door which led to the room which once belong to Balinor.  
"Arth-" She started as I turn her around opening the large wooden door before moving my body behind her, covering her eyes with my hands.  
"Its a surprise Merls. No peeping" I instruct as I turn her once more facing the now open door and leaning forwards hinting for her to walk forwards.  
We took a few steps forwards before I remembered the ten steps or so which led into the large room.  
"Close your eyes" I mumbled feeling her eye lashes tickle my palms indicating she had followed my command.  
She lets out a adorable squeak as I lifted her into my arms bridal style and a smile made its way across my face as she wraps her arms around my neck.  
I walk up the steps unaffected by her slight weight in my arms as I enter the large room, feeing almost as if I was carrying my bride into her new chambers.  
I shook the thought away as I let down her legs slowly making sure she knew I was letting her down before I did so.  
Even with me lowering her slowly and carefully to the floor she still staggered on her feet, tumbling into my chest her eyes still crumpled shut.  
I instantly react my hands balancing her at the hips as she regains her grace, which was not much, she still was clumsy as ever.  
"Arthuuuurrr can I open my eyes now" She begs, drawing my name out in the way she knew I couldn't say no.  
"Fine" I comply watching intently as her blue eyes flutter open, her blue eyes still taking my breath away.  
She was truly the most beautiful creature I had laid eyes upon.  
"Arthur..Wha..." She trails away as she looks around her eyes going wide.  
"This tower used to belong to magic users. This room was last used by your Farther, Its yours now" I say watching her face closely.  
"Oh..Arthur..I..I don't know what to say.." She whispers her voice cracking as she takes in the room, her eyes watering.  
"Thank you?" I joke, trying not to make her cry.  
"I..I.." Was all she said and before I knew what to say back she had jumped into my arms.  
I have no idea how she managed it in a dress, but I felt her legs wrap around my waist, her arms around my neck, and I stagger backwards slamming into the wall behind me as my arms wrapped around her instinctively.  
Once I had regained my balance I hear her crying into my neck, her tears falling onto my skin.  
"Oh Merlyn...I didn't mean for you to cry..I thought you would like it" I say tightening my grip on her as her head snaps up.  
"I do like it, Arthur. I love it! It's just the thought of Farther, I miss him" She whispers her words making my heart break.  
"I know you do. Even though he was wrong about magic and was not the most caring Farther in the world, I miss mine too" I reply letting down her legs as I felt her move them.  
"Thank you" She whisper's her face still buried in my neck, her hot breath against my neck making me shiver.  
"Your Welcome" I stutter as she wraps herself tighter around me, her long raven hair tickling my nose.  
I lean my head on hers, closing my eyes as I revel in our closeness, the scent of her trailing up my nose and I held her tighter still, cherishing, remembering everything about her.  
The feel of her body against mine, Her feminine smell, her small hands gripping the back of my shirt like her life depended on it.  
Everything.  
"Arthur?" I hear her whisper and I look down to meet her eyes.  
"Yes?" I answer.  
"I can't thank you enough. Not just for this" She says motioning her hand around the room before carrying on "But for all you've done for me. For accepting me for who I am, magic and all" She says her eyes full of gratitude and again that something I still couldn't put my finger on.

 _'Is that you feel the same way too'_

As she looked upwards, her eyes once more staring into my soul, I felt the need to bend down and touch my lips on hers.  
And just as the thought crossed my mind my body complied, leaning down to her level.  
Our lips where inches away from each other and I could feel her warm breath against my skin as we shore oxygen.  
I move forwards just a centimetre, testing if she would move away, but to my surprise she stayed.  
It was then my body couldn't take it any longer and my lips collided with her soft ones.  
My heart melts and skips with joy at the same time, the sensation of my lips on hers finally making me feel so alive, as if a spark had been ignited between us which soon grew into a fire as she leans into the kiss.  
"Arthur!" A voice broke through the haze I was in, like someone was throwing bucket and buckets of ice cold water onto the newly lit fire.  
"Arthur! Art-Oh.." The voice trails off and I look up to find Gwaine and Percival stood open mouthed as they gawk in stunned silence at Merlyn and I.  
"Urmm...I..Uh" Gwaine starts stuttering and I had to hold back a snigger at his disbelief.  
After all I did tell him I thought of Merlyn as nothing but a friend a sister at best. I obviously lied.  
"What is it Gwaine?" I ask trying not to concentrate on the fact Merlyn had hidden her reddening cheeks into my neck.  
"I..what..um" Was my answer before Percival smacked Gwaine around the head brining the poor man out of his stutter.  
"Oh yes.. King James of York has required your audience immediately"  
"On what cause?" I question.  
"Marriage" Gwaine answers, making me choke on oxygen.  
"Wh..What!?" I stutter.  
"Marriage, Arthur. You know when two peopl-" He starts a hint of sarcasm in his voice.  
"I know what marriage is you idiot! There's just one problem with this marriage!" I near shout  
"And what is that?" He answers and I almost let go of Merlyn just to go hit the idiot across the head, but that would have required letting go of Merlyn so I didn't move an inch.  
"Oh I don't know..maybe the face that I am a man!" I exclaim hearing Merlyn snuffle a giggle into my neck.  
"Ahhh...Indeed..urm.. He does not wish to wed you, but the person who has the most influence on you" Gwaine answers almost as cryptically as the darn dragon who speaks to Merlyn.  
'The most influential person...' I think 'But that's Merl-'  
"Merlyn!?" I shout, the realisation hitting me "He wants to marry Merlin!?"  
"Yes, he wishes to ally with Camelot and sees Merlyn as the perfect suitor for himself"  
"No. He will not have her" I growl possessively hands tightening on the said woman's hips.  
"He wants Merlyn as his wife or he will bring war to Camelot" Percival growls, the brotherly need to protect Merlyn surely kicking in.  
"War?" I hear Merlyn whisper, her emotions flashing through her eyes, gone was the giggling from earlier.  
"Merlyn dont even think abo-" I start, being cut off by the woman I loved.  
"I'll do it. If it means Camelot does not go to war, I will marry him" She confirms my fears.  
She was a selfless woman, one of features I usually loved on her, but now I despised it.  
She would give anything to protect Camelot, but I could not let her do this. Not when I wanted her as my own Queen not some other countries. She was mine. I knew it was selfish but I needed her by my side.  
"If it means you and the Knights don't go to war I will do anything" She adds.  
"No, Merlyn I will not have you marry someone you barely know, who surely is only marrying you for your position and power" I answer trying to persuade her from the though of marrying another.  
"I know, But I must. I can take care of myself." She whispers her voice quivering in wavering strength.  
She didn't want to marry the man but she would do so for Camelot. For destiny.  
For me.

 _'And I know,_  
 _The scariest part is letting go'_

She strides so confidently towards were King James awaited her arrival her pale face void of any expressions.  
I couldn't take it any longer and I rushed forwards, grabbing on to her upper arm making her turn towards me.  
"Please Merlyn we can take him and his army down in hours, Our forces are much more powerful" I plead, ready to get on my knees and beg her not to go forth.  
Not to leave me.  
"May that be true, the war will only bring more death to this land, have we not spilt too much blood already? Must we spill the blood of so many good men? What if you go off to war and do not come back? Will you so willingly leave your Kingdom King less? I will not take such a chance of going into a stupid war at the price of your death, not when it can be so easily avoided" She says tear collecting in her gorgeous eyes.  
"Please don't do it Merlyn, Don't marry him. Don't leave me" I whisper tears of my own collecting him my eyes.  
"Arthur, Please do not make this harder. I do not wish to marry him, I wish to marry another, marry for the love I feel for him. But I must marry King James, I will not risk loosing you completely" She answers a lone tear rolling down her cheek and I wanted so much to brush it away.

 _'Cause love is a ghost you can't control'_

And with that she tug her arm gently from my grasp, wiping the tear away before striding towards the door.  
I rush after her as she opens the wooden door, the oak slamming against the wall with a loud bang.  
If she was going to do this, I would make sure she had my support.  
I take her arm, leading her into the room, her hands quivering against my biceps.  
She was scared of marrying King James, just as I was scared of loosing her.  
We walk further into the room her hand's gripping my arm tighter as if seeking my comfort and I place my hand over hers.  
"Ah, my betrothed, your beauty lives up to the stories I have heard" A deep voice sounds through the council room.  
My eyes fly towards it, landing on a man who must have been King James.  
He looked the same age as I, maybe a couple of years older.  
He was just taller than I but was built slimmer.  
He had dark brown hair with hazel eyes and a strong jaw line.  
I turn to Merlyn wanting to see her reaction to the fairly handsome man.  
Her eyes were cold, her lips drawn into a thin line and her free hand was clenched into a fist while the other gripped my arm so tightly I was pretty sure my arm would fall off.  
I knew that face, it was Merlyn's face of anger and god help King James for he was going to need it.  
1,2,3. I counted silently and just as I thought she expounded words being spat out harshly from her usually smiling lips.  
"I am not your betrothed until I say so! I have not taken kindly to your terms King James! If I had the choice I would never consider marrying a selfish man like you! But you have given me no choice in the matter." She shouts her voice clear and confident unlike it was minutes before.  
"Lady Merlyn that is no way to speak to you future husband!" He snaps back as Merlyns hands tighten even further against my arm making me wince a bit at the pain.  
 _Oh dear, wrong choice buddy_ I thought feeling Merlyns magic buzz against her skin.  
"I will speak to you as I wish! I will not bow down to the likes of you! So you better get used to it! For I will never be the perfect wife you were hoping for." She growls, the sound making me fill with pride.  
"You will do as I say!" He snarls.  
"Oh no. Now you have done it. Why could you not have shut your mouth?" I hear Morgana mutter and I smiled at her words.  
"Now look here! You may be a King but I am Emrys! I can swipe your pitiful life off this earth with only a hand gesture I would not test me if I was you!" She screamed her eyes flashing gold in anger and the windows all smashed around us. None of the little shards hitting any of us but the evidence of how easily Merlyn could kill King James had been showed.  
The last time she was this angry was in the battle of Camelann when Morgause sunk her sword into my stomach and Merlyn thought me dead.  
King James stood pale and mouth gaping in shock, the complete opposite to my reaction as I saw Merlyn rid the world of Morgause in a second flat. (Don't listen to Leon because I did not faint like a girl..pfft)  
"Now that I have made that clear, I am willing to marry you on the conditions of, one you leave Camelot alone, two I am allowed to visit here when ever I want, third I will use my magic any time I want, fourthly I am allowed to bring Aithusa with me and lastly you will not touch me in any way." She says her voice authoritative.  
"I agree with those terms" Was all he managed to say.

 _'I know that we're both afraid_  
 _We both made the same mistakes'_

It was at that moment, as the words came from his mouth I realised.  
She wouldn't be mine.  
I was too late, I couldn't have the one thing I wanted more than even my Kingdom.  
I had been too scared to tell her, too afraid of being rejected to tell her.  
And now she was too marry another.  
Another mistake, which trumps all, I had to add to my list.  
For I had let the one thing I loved with all my heart slip through my fingers.  
I was so deeply in love with Merlyn but I was too late to tell her and the thought hurt more than any wound suffered on the battle field for I was bleeding slowly out from the inside, my heart cracking as it leaked of pain.

 _'An open heart is an open wound to you_  
 _And in the wind of a heavy choice'_

No cure would save me now.  
Not when the choice she made was making me bleed so heavily in agony.  
Her choice was one to save me but the thing she didn't know was she was killing me slowly as I would have to watch her marry a man who was not me.  
She was trying to avoid putting me in pain of war but yet it felt like I was in a battle.  
A battle of hearts as I so desperately wanted her to marry me but it could never be, not now.  
Not ever.  
She was not mine to love.

 _'Love has a quiet voice_  
 _Still your mind, now I'm yours to choose'_

I felt almost ashamed of myself, King Arthur the mightiest warrior of the realm, King of Camelot too scared to admit to the one woman I would ever love of my feelings.  
I had fallen for her the first time we had met but it took me nearly dying in the battle of Camelann, nearly a decade later to realise.  
What I had always thought of sibling love was in fact love in its purest forms hidden away.  
Hidden away by the walls I had built around my fragile heart to prevent feeling exactly how I felt now.  
I was heartbroken.  
The love of my life would not wear the crown of Camelot like I had so hoped but the crown of York.  
She would never be my Queen, never be my sorceress, never be the woman I could call mine.  
I would have to watch her walk down the aisle towards another man.  
Emrys would never be mine.

* * *

 ** _So guys that was it chapter 1!  
_ Chaper 2 is already in the making! :)**  
 **Hope you guys like this :)**  
 **Any reviews left I will love you forever ;)**  
 **Anywayyyy... Favourite and follow and I shall see you soon! :)**  
 **-Leggomygreggo2 xx**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Hello all :) Sorry this took me forever!  
I cant believe the reaction I've had to this fic!  
8 reviews, 26 favs and 46 follows! Thank you guys! :)**_

 _ **DISCLAIMER: IDOM**_

 _ **Anyway (finally) chapter 2:**_

Still Arthur POV- 2 days later:

 ** _'And all of the steps that led me to you_**

 _ **And all of the hell I had to walk through** '_

I walk down the halls, eyes staring absent minded forwards lost in my depression.  
I moved almost as if in slow motion as I watch the world go by.  
For my world had stopped, the vibrant colours around me had turned black and white as my heart darkened in pain.  
I was a ghost of my former self, already thinking I had lost the most precious thing to my heart when really, she still remained near.  
My heart could not take talking to her like everything was okay, seeing her everyday like if she was not engaged to marry another.  
I knew it was stupid but I avoided her like the plague in a attempt to slow the pain which spread through my body. The heartache I felt was like poison in my veins slowly mixing with my blood, travelling in agonising pain around my body, slowly making its way to my heart.  
Two days had been since the day King James came to Camelot and it seemed the thought of Merlyn with another did not become any easier.  
In fact every ticking second that passed without her made me yearn for her presence, for it seemed ignoring the woman I loved was breaking my heart further still.

I was walking towards the training grounds, intending to work my anger and sadness out on one of the knights, forget the pain for a little while and concentrate on my training.  
I walk to the armoury, grabbing my light armour and Excalibur, my hand gliding along the precious blade as my thoughts turned to her again.  
The sword bought with it so many memories of the two of us, of the battles we faced together as two sides of the same coin. It seemed everything I touched bought memories of my sorceress to me.  
The flowers of her beauty.  
The forest of her free spirit.  
The rivers of her blue eyes.  
The singing of birds of her angelic voice.  
She was everywhere I looked but yet I could not have her. She was like a feather floating in front of me, sinking to my level, close enough to catch, the feel of her skin skimming my fingers before the wind took her away again.

I shake my head, feeling the lone tear which trickled down my cheek fall to the floor.  
I wipe the evidence of tears away quickly, it seemed my eyes watered with salty tears, more in the past two days than in my whole life. Even fathers death came no where near to the pain I felt now.  
I take my time putting the armour on, not really wanting to face the world without Merlyn by my side.  
After all she had been their for nearly a decade, it felt so terribly wrong without her it was as if I had lost a limb, and I suppose I had in some way. But it was not a limb i had lost but my heart for it would follow her anywhere she went, forever loving Emrys.  
I carry on down the long hallways, taking the steps from the armoury to the outside corridor, the wind a gentle caress against my skin and I could not help wanting it to be Merlyn.  
I round the corner, my mind a million miles away all thoughts on her gentle lips against mine until my eyes landed on the very person.  
It was then my world came crashing back to reality, the colours bursting back at the sight of her.  
But I did not smile in joy of seeing her again, no. Whatever was left of my heart was crumbling away leaving a empty space behind.  
There she was, the woman my heart so desired, kissing another man.  
Her lips pressed against someone who was not I.  
I was bought out of my hurt, shocked state as Excalibur slips from my hand crashing loudly onto the floor, the sound echoing off the castle walls

 _' **But I wouldn't trade a day for the chance to say**_  
 ** _My love, I'm in love with you'_**

I turn swiftly on my feet, nearly tripping over them in my haste, one thing passing through my brain.  
I needed to get away and fast, the dam of tears would soon break and I wanted to be in the comforts of my chambers when they came flooding down.  
I wanted to erase the image so desperately out of my mind, the image of her lips on King James forever more stuck in my thoughts haunting me of what could have been mine.  
I could feel the walls I built in the last two days quiver and fall, the dam cracking at the edges ready to burst.  
"Arthur! Wait!" I hear her voice shout but I dare not face her for I knew I would not be able to hold back the emotions which so wanted to escape.  
"Please! Arthur!" Her voice begs the sound so sad and pleading I couldn't help but stop, I would do anything for her.

I feel her small hands grab onto my arm, the touch the first in days sending chills of pleasure down my spine as if I was drinking for the first time after a long drought, her touch replenishing my thirst.  
"Its not what it looked like" Her voice says almost begging me to believe her, but how could I when another man's lips were so clearly pressed against hers.  
"I know what it was Merlyn" I scoff, feeling utterly betrayed but so heartbroken, my voice betraying me as it cracked.  
"You don't understand he fo-" Her voice sounded so quiet as if ashamed.  
"I understand Merlyn. He is a handsome man after all and your betrothed, I cannot blame yo-" I start ready to escape but she cut me off.  
"Would you shut up and let me explain!" She exclaims, her voice just as unstable as mine maybe even worse and for the first time since she shouted my name pleading me to stop, I looked at her face.  
She had a tear trailing down her cheek, her eyes blazing with so many emotions.  
I nod my head in a silent gesture for her to carry on.  
"I was walking down the corridor, I had just been with Morgana and Guinevere and was making my way back to my chambers then..he grabbed me pinning against the wall and his lips were on mine, I didn't even know what was going on until I heard your sword clatter to the floor" She explains eyes pleading with mine to believe her.  
I should have known she would not willingly kiss the man not when she made it so clear he was not to touch her in any way.  
I felt guilt rise up my chest, how could I think that of her?  
"Oh yes..urm.. your sword" She adds as an after thought handing me the said weapon with quivering hands.  
Her palm was turned up the sharp blade resting on her usually pale hands.  
My eye brows scrunch in confusion, her palm was a shade of bright red. It was not a cold day so it could not be due to frosty weather...Unless...  
"You slapped him?" I question taking my precious weapon from her hands, sheathing it before taking her surely stinging hands.  
"Ahh..Yes..Felt quite good if I am honest" Was her reply as a smile makes its way across my face.  
"Well he deserved it" I snarl, knowing that she would know it was aimed at King James and not her.  
"I better get used to it, after all he is my future husband" She comments her voice sounding so sad.  
"Merlyn I-" I start wanting to tell her she did not have to go on with the stupid wedding.  
"No it's all right Arthur, really. I made my choice. I would do anything to keep you safe and if this is what I have to do I will bare it" Was all she said before walking away, her head bowed and I swore I saw her shoulders trembled slightly almost as if she held in her sobs.  
For surely she was, not letting me see her tears as she knew it would only make it harder for I, seeing her so sad, knowing she did not want to marry the slimy git who was King James.  
I had forgotten, in my own depression and heartbreak that she may be feeling the same.  
Lost and broken not knowing where to go without the other, there but not really existing until the other half was close.

* * *

It was later on in the day, when the sun was lowering behind the trees of the endless forest, was when I found myself sat in the hall, Morgana on my right side, Merlyn the other. The Knights, Gwen and Gaius also sat around the round table, all minus Gwaine who was surely, either late or in the tavern.  
And at the opposite side of the table sat my nemesis, the slimy git sat smug as he took pleasure in taunting me as his eyes trailed Merlyn's body.  
I turn towards Merlyn almost tempted to grab her soft cheeks and lean down and crash our lips together so I could swipe the smug smile away from the clot pole's face, and obviously to satisfy my need of touching her.  
Instead though I settle on causally placing my arm on the back of her chair leaning slightly further than necessary so it was as if I was hugging her from the side.  
She turns her head towards me, her eyes full of mirth as a smirk takes over her face.  
No doubt she had figured out what I was doing, after all she had more brain than most people, I included.  
I was surprised when I felt her lean into my side and I had to hide my smirk behind a convenient sip of my wine.  
The knights were bickering among themselves, Morgana joining in sometimes while Gaius shook his head in amusement.  
"Wonder where Gwaine has gotten to. He said he would be here" I hear Percival say, his voice slightly concerned for the other man.  
"I'm sure he's on his way, you know Gwaine. Either late or drunk" Elyan jokes bringing a chuckle from the gentle giant.

And as if the very man could hear our conversation he strode in.  
He did not look all too happy, in fact his face was void of his usual charming smile.  
He lands in his seat in a massive thump slouching grumpily.  
I was about to ask why he was in such a bad mood when the door opened once more.  
"Oh here she comes. Joy to the world! Stupid evil old toad!" I hear Gwaine grumble.  
"Oh dear" I hear Merlyn giggle as if she knew what was going on.  
"Gwaineeeee!" I hear a screechy feminine voice sound through the hall the sound making me cringe.  
"Dear God, please rid me of this woman!" I hear him mumble once more leading to another round of adorable giggles from Merlyn.  
"Gwaine, my dear little brother! Why don't you introduce me to your handsome friends!" It says again, her voice was so high and annoying I was already wanting to get rid of her, no wonder poor Gwaine wanted her gone.  
"Oh what a splendid idea!" Gwaine replied sarcasm dripping from his voice.  
"Yes do introduce us!" I hear Elyan say, hiding a smirk as Lancelot who sat by him tried not to laugh at Gwaine's sour looking face.  
"Adelaide, this is Merlyn" he says gesturing towards the woman I loved.  
Adelaide tried hiding her face of disgust as she looked at Merlyn most likely jealous of Merlyn's natural beauty.

Adelaide was not ugly but yet I would not consider her any where near as beautiful as Merlyn.  
She had a plain face, not pale, but not tanned like her younger sibling.  
Her eyes where a lighter brown and if I was honest looked rather boring compared to Gwaine's darker, richer ones.  
She had a round face and a rather big nose.  
All in all, Gwaine obviously gained the better genes.

"Ah, the sorceress" She says, her voice sounding almost like a sneer as she looked down at Merlyn as if thinking she the better woman.  
"Indeed I am" Merlyn replies her voice calm as if the tone of the plainer looking woman had no effect.  
I tuned out when Gwaine introduced the rest of us, not interested in the way she threw herself at every man, giggling and flirting at every available man, turning her nose away from Lance when he showed her his ring.  
That was until King James was introduced.  
"And this is King James of York" Gwaine grumbled. The said King stood and bowed lowly, taking her hand and kissing it, his eyes never leaving the other woman's.  
From then on Gwaines older sibling was quite literally all over the man.

She might aswell have been sat on his lap with the way she leant towards him, and the man seemed to not care. Infact he had his arm wrapped around the woman's waist, laughing loudly as she whispered in his ears.

I glare at the man. If he was acting like this now, how unfaithful would he be when he was married to my love? It was not fair on Merlyn, she deserved so much more than the scum who sat opposite me. She deserved a man who would cherish her, love her forever, have children with, grow old with.

My heart clenches at the thought, I wanted all of those things. I loved her with all my heart and I would forever more. My heart was craving to have her for my own, to wake up every morning to her beautiful face, her flowing black locks tickling my chest and her vibrant blue eyes sluggishly opening, the gorgeous orbs full of love as she gazed at me. I wanted to feel her stomach full with child, to place my hands on her full stomach and feel my child kick against my palms, to see a mix of her and I running around the castle. I wanted to grow old with her, spend the rest of my years in her presence, die together, knowing the kingdom would be in good hands as our children grew into adults.

A high pitch giggle, which sounded more like a pig being strangled, bought me from my thoughts. I cringe once more at the sound, the noise going right through me as I look up, Gwaine's so called sister was giggling at something King James had said, her hand resting on his shoulders as she leant on him. I pick up my wine, taking a long gulp, downing the red liquid as anger bubbled to the surface.

How dare he flirt with another woman when he was betrothed say opposite him. How dare he fli shamelessly to a woman ten times more ugly than the one sat next too me? It wasn't like I wanted the man to flirt with Merlyn, but what he was doing was so wrong. It was dishonorable and unbelievable, a man should show respect to their future brides, it disgusted me. Was he doing it to rub the fact that he had Merlyn and could still have other woman, in my face? Was it to anger me?

Because if it was, it was working.

The man was embarrassing my Merlyn and I would not let him get away with it. He would not use Merlyn as a pawn in his game. I started to stand, ready to punch some sense into the man when I felt small hands wrapping around my wrist, pulling me back down to my chair. I feel one of those hands entwine with mine, Merlyn's dainty and feminine hands slotting into my bigger, callused hands, almost like a jigsaw piece fitting with another.

"Arthur, leave it, it's not worth it" Merlyn voice whispers into my ear, her warm breath gliding across my skin making me shiver.

"He is dishonouring you name. Mocking you!" I protest wanting to defend the honor of the woman I loved.

"He is punishing me, I think. I wounded his pride when I rejected him. He is doing this to anger both of us, thinks it will make me jealous. It won't go on much longer just let me handle this." Her voice whispers, the sound strong and confident and I instantly knew she would handle the situation. I feel her small hand clench around mine before she stood, the deep blue dress she wore swaying at the movement.

She cough's loudly to gain the slimy gits attention and as his head turns towards her, she does something surprising. She grabs her chalice, which she had hardly touched and walked calmly to the other side of the table.

My eyes where glued on her, trying to decipher what she was going to do and just as if she heard my thoughts her arm swung backwards and as if in slow motion, she brings her arm forth and the rest of her wine flies from the chalice, landing all over King James.

I sat shocked for a second, eyes wide as I replay the scene in my head a couple of times, before my brain registered what she had done. It was then, after my brain caught up, I had to stop myself from bursting out laughing.

"I may hate being betrothed to the likes of you, but if you are forcing my hand into a love less marriage then I expect you to have honor! You are the one who is making me marry you, not the other way around! If I had the choice I would never, in a million years would have agreed, but since I don't you will be miserable too. You have no right to use me as a part of your sick little game. You marry me and there will be no other women! I do not care for your need for heir's! You have chosen to force my hand into a marriage so you will have to suffer the consequences." Merlyn's voice rang through the hall and I smirk at her words, the feeling of proudness seeping from me as she walks away.

I had almost forgotten how fearless and, as Gwaine would say, 'badass' she was. But as she strode away leaving a gaping King James in her wake I remembered how much I loved that side of her.

 _' **And I know,**_

 ** _The scariest part is letting go'_**

The clang of my sword echoed through the air, making my ears ring slightly as I swing again, relentlessly attacking my opponent which, unfortunately for him, was Leon. Anger was coursing through my veins, making my attacks violent and strong but also uncoordinated and reckless. I didn't think and plan my actions, I just swung. It wasn't Leon I swung at but King James, his face I was imaging as I swung Excalibur towards him. My anger was overpowering, making me growl like a predetor after it pray as I used all my strength to lunge forwards and using my momentum to thrust my swords forth towards my target. However, I wasn't planning or prepared for what happened next. As my weapon got close to Leon, the man blocked it in its path, pushing it away as he spun around, his sword sailing in the air before I could react, slicing tender skin as it made its mark.

"Arthur!" I hear a voice shout, sounding distant over the pain which burnt my arm, shoulder and chest. I could feel sticky liquid seep from the sobbing wound, leaking down my arms in a crimson river, dripping to the floor and tainting green luscious grass as I followed it down sinking too my knee's.

I felt small hands on me before the pain reacted as someone pressed down on the wound, the agony almost too much as I sway dangerously on my feet, struggling to stay conscious.

"Please Arthur, stay with me" I hear her say, the sound choked as I leant more on the warm body that knelt near me, taking in as much of her heat before I buried my pain creased face into her neck.

"Don't go...please dont leave me" I hear her sweet flawless voice buzz in my ear, the familiar sound soothing me as my eyes drooped, closing slowly as I felt my world go blank.

 _' **cause love is a ghost you can't control** ,'_

I was drifting. One moment in darkness the next in the light, struggling to fight off the black fog which wrapped around my brain

The light was distant almost as if it was getting further away, the dark abyss, wrapping around me dragging me further into the blackness.

I struggle to stay in the light, thrashing away from darkness's tight grip, desperate to get away.

I try to think of something other than pain and darkness, something to lead me to the light.

But it seemed I could not escape for I sunk deeper into the darkness.

 ** _'I promise you the truth can't hurt us now,'_**

I could hear a voice. Distant and angelic.

My body seemed to react to her for my struggle against the dark, once more had started.

Her voice was closer, stronger as I fought the dark, as if I was geting nearer to the light and to her, away from deaths clutches.

I felt a hand, small and feminine, rest on my chest, the touch bringing me comfort and safety, making me feel protected.

I feel a tingling beneath her palms before it travelled through my body, giving me strength as I sigh, the feeling utter bliss as her magic swept through me.

I could feel all her emotions swimming through me as her magic spread from head to toe.

Scared.

Sad.

Heartbroken.

Everything I could feel was her, her magic, her warmth, her touch.

It comforted me, and I let myself give in to sleep, knowing she was keeping away the dark void which was death.

 _ **'So let the words slip out of your mouth'**_

"Arth.. Have..wake up" I hear an angel say, my ears catching bits of what she said.

"Pl..ase..don't leave me" it adds and I feel my heart melt at the sound, her voice sounding as if she was crying.

"I love you" She says again, the confession making my heart sore.

"So much" She adds as I feel her hands slip into mine, before a slight weight rested on my chest.

I feel my eyes flutter as they try to open, almost as if they were a butterfly, taking flight for the first time, before they succeeded, blinded temporarily by bright lights.

I blink away the light until my vision returned, surprised as I found myself in Merlyn's chambers rather than mine.

I look down towards the weight on my chest to find long black locks sprawled across my skin.

Her face was in my direction but I dare not speak as her eyes were closed in sleep.

I lay there for a couple more minutes before I move my hand to her face cupping pale cheeks before tangling my fingers in ebony.

"I love you too" I mummble as sleep once more crept towards me and I joined her into the land of slumber, pale skin and blue eyes filling my dreams.

 _ **Well there we go! Chapter 2! Sorry this took me so damn long!**_

 _ **Anyway...tell me what you thought and follow and favorite.**_

 _ **Until next time,**_

 _ **-Leggomygreggo x**_


End file.
